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World of Warcraft humor


Rogue says 'Got a quest to kill a fel reaver - anyone want to group?'
Crickets chirp.
Priest says 'Me too, who wants to group with me?'
Mage says 'I do!'
Hunter says 'I do!'
Warrior says 'I do!'
Druid says 'Need ranged DPS?'
Shaman says 'I do!'
Paladin says 'Hey, I can heal too!'
Warlock says 'Sure, why not?'
Priest says 'Okay, I'll take Mage, Warrior, Warlock, and Hunter.'
Rogue says 'Aw, crap.'
Hunter points and laughs at Druid.
Druid shifts into cat form for no apparent reason.
Buffs happen with nifty /party chat macros.
Warlock, Shaman, Paladin, Hunter, Druid, and Priest /whisper Mage, 'water plz'
Mage sighs.
Warrior says 'Trash mob wander incoming. I got it.'
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 75.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 71.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 75.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 74.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 81.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 86.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 68.
Warrior crits Trash Mob for 135.
Warrior says 'I rock!'
Trash Mob is at 98% health.
Hunter says 'Wow, look at Mr. Protection Spec go.'
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 81.
Warrior crits Trash Mob for 146.
Warrior says 'A new record!'
Warrior flexes.
Mage burns his meditate for mana to make more water.
Warlock summons an imp.
Imp says 'Man, that warrior sucks.'
Warrior is still whittling away at Trash Mob.
Hunter says 'Anyone have any meat?'
Hunter's Pet sighs.
Druid shifts into travel form for no apparent reason.
Paladin says 'Hey, I can heal too!'
Shaman says 'So can I, but you don't see me getting nerfed, do you?'
Paladin sighs.
Rogue says 'I'll help!'
Rogue backstabs Trash Mob for 1450.
Rogue cheap shots Trash Mob.
Trash Mob is stunned!
Rogue hits Trash Mob for 605.
Rogue crits Trash Mob for 1145.
Rogue hits Trash Mob for 786.
Rogue crits Trash Mob for 1044.
Rogue crits Trash Mob for 1089.
Rogue points and laughs at Warrior.
Warrior says 'Hey, guess who forgot to sunder?'
Trash Mob hits Rogue for 1014.
Trash Mob hits Rogue for 989.
Trash Mob crits Rogue for 2155.
Trash Mob crits Rogue for 2341.
Rogue has died.
Warrior points and laughs at Rogue.
Warlock says 'Fine, I'll handle it.'
Warlock summons a felguard.
Felguard points and laughs at Warrior.
Warrior cries.
Warlock sends in Felguard.
Warlock casts a DoT.
Warlock casts another DoT.
Warlock casts yet another DoT.
Warlock nukes the crap out of the mob while juggling, reading War and Peace, and watching reruns of Cops on TV.
Felguard holds aggro the whole time.
Trash Mob has died.
Warlock receives Soul Shard.
Hunter slaps Hunter's Pet.
Hunter says 'Pay attention!'
Shaman probably said something here, but who listens to them anyway?
Mage finishes handing out water to everyone.
Warrior and Hunter whisper Mage, 'food plz'
Priest says 'Hurry up, Mage - let's go!'
Mage contemplates rerolling.
Druid shifts into bear form for no apparent reason.
Warrior says 'Okay, pulling more trash mobs.'
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 93.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 96.
Warrior hits Trash Mob for 91.
Shaman says 'I'll help.'
Shaman drops an air totem.
Shaman drops an earth totem.
Shaman casts Rockbiter.
Shaman says 'OOM'
Shaman sits.
Paladin says 'At least I'm not that guy.'
Hunter says 'Anyone got any arrows?'
Mage says 'I got this.'
Mage summons Air Elemental.
Mage orders Air Elemental to attack.
Mage orders Air Elemental to attack.
Mage orders Air Elemental to attack.
Mage orders Air Elemental to attack.
Air Elemental just stands there.
Mage says '6 months and they still haven't fixed this stupid bug!'
Mage hits Trash Mob for 1441.
Mage hits Trash Mob for 1255.
Warrior says 'Yeah, about those sunders...'
Trash Mob hits Mage for 1340.
Trash Mob hits Mage for 1412.
Mage is encased in a block of ice!
Mage says 'I'm used to it.'
Shaman stands up.
Shaman drops a fire totem.
Shaman drops a water totem.
Shaman casts Lightning Shield.
Shaman says 'OOM'
Shaman sits.
Druid runs off to find some water so he can shift to sea lion form for no apparent reason.
Priest heals Mage for 4103.
Rogue yells 'Oh, I see how it is!'
Priest shrugs.
Warlock kills the Trash Mob accidentally while discussing Tolstoy with someone over AIM.
Warlock receives Soul Shard.
Mage sighs.
Druid comes back with a Fel Reaver chasing him.
Warrior says 'On it!'
Warrior charges the Fel Reaver.
Mage, Hunter, and Paladin attack the Fel Reaver.
Shaman is still OOM.
Warlock is now AFK.
Rogue whispers Druid, 'battle rez?'
Druid whispers Rogue, 'I'm balance specced!'
Rogue sighs.
Priest heals Warrior for a lot.
Druid shifts into moonkin form.
Mage says 'Seriously?'
Mage nukes the Fel Reaver for a lot.
Hunter shoots the Fel Reaver for a lot.
Druid nukes the Fel Reaver for not as much as Mage.
Fel Reaver crits Druid for 12000.
Druid is dead.
Mage yells 'WTB threat reduction, PST to Druid!'
Hunter snickers.
Fel Reaver is sort of beat up.
Fel Reaver cleaves Warrior for 1200.
Fel Reaver cleaves Paladin for 1340.
Fel Reaver cleaves Hunter's Pet for 1560.
Hunter's Pet is dead.
Hunter says 'Anyone have any meat?'
Fel Reaver cleaves Warrior for 1386.
Fel Reaver cleaves Paladin for 1421.
Paladin panics.
Paladin bubblehearths.
Priest, Mage, Warrior, Shaman and Hunter shake their heads.
Priest says 'OOM!'
Shaman stands up.
Shaman says 'I've got heals.'
Shaman heals Warrior for 800.
Shaman heals Warrior for 810.
Shaman heals Warrior for 786.
Shaman heals Warrior for 803.
Shaman says 'OOM'
Shaman sits.
Priest sighs.
Fel Reaver hits Warrior like Warrior stole his bike.
Warrior is dead.
Mage does the math.
Mage is encased in a block of ice!
Hunter does the math.
Hunter feigns death.
Priest does the math.
Priest fades.
Shaman does the math.
Shaman sighs.
Fel Reaver hits Shaman for a really, really big number.
Shaman is dead.
Shaman is resurrected.
Shaman says 'Self rez FTW!'
Fel Reaver hits Shaman for an even bigger number.
Shaman is dead.
Fel Reaver turns Priest into chunky salsa.
Priest is dead.
Mage pops Cold Snap.
Mage is encased in a block of ice!
Mage says 'Hey, 30 seconds is better than nothing.'
Fel Reaver gnaws on the ice.
Mage makes out his last will and testament.
Fel Reaver stomps Mage like a narc at a biker rally.
Mage is dead.
Warlock is no longer AFK.
Warlock looks around.
Warlock shrugs.
Warlock sends in Felguard.
Warlock casts a DoT.
Warlock casts another DoT.
Warlock casts yet another DoT.
Warlock fear kites the Fel Reaver while taking an online test on quantum physics.
Fel Reaver is dead.
Warlock receives Soul Shard.
Hunter sighs.

(Made by Rezdan)

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Comments

( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
leppard
Oct. 15th, 2008 05:57 pm (UTC)
I was never going to waste my time with an online game, no sir, no way, no how. I have had a nubmer of good friends over the last few years try to pursuade me that it was great fun, not addictive, that you play as much or little as you like.

Then at last I succumbed, did the trial period, after 1 day signed up...and now....well...lol...
I get it, I really get the whole addiction thing, I find myself slotting it into every spare minute I can, trying to get that elusive lvl 70 so I can find out what real raiding feels like.
I can stop...any time right?
So this made me cry laughing, thanks for a great morning!

fionn_mcgreggor
Oct. 15th, 2008 07:01 pm (UTC)
EQ, but still gives me a chuckle
________________________________

SCENE: Rivendell. Elrond is studying.

GANDALF: Ach! Damn it!

ELROND: Gandalf! Where did you come from? ... You're naked.

GANDALF: Stupid halflings who can't play their class, that's what happened.

ELROND: What? Where?

GANDALF: Moria. We were in the safe hall at Balin's Tomb and Aragorn was going to pull some orcs to clear the way to the zoneout.

ELROND: Which halfling messed it up? Frodo?

GANDALF: No, it was Pippin. I didn't even want to bring him along but Frodo did insist. Aragorn was going to pull some orcs but out comes Pippin to 'see what Aragorn was doing' and manages to aggro half the zone.

ELROND: So you got wiped out by a horde of orcs? Yuck.

GANDALF: Oh, no. They were green to most of us, so we cut through them all right. I was impressed by Legolas' bow crits. But then the Cave Troll got aggroed.

ELROND: But there were nine of you, you could have handled the cave troll.

GANDALF: Oh, and we did. Except Frodo didn't know how to manage aggro properly. The troll started beating on him.

ELROND: Oh, no. Poor Frodo.

GANDALF: No, actually, Frodo was fine. He had a mithril chain tunic on.

ELROND: Jeez, just because he's friends with Bilbo, does Bilbo have to twink him like that?

GANDALF: Yeah, no kidding. So the troll ran and Pippin of course forgets to snare.

ELROND: Aragorn's a ranger, why didn't he snare?

GANDALF: He was our main tank and was busy keeping the orcs aggroed on him. Pippin was just sleeping on the job. So the troll ran, and before we finally cut him down, he chain aggroed the Balrog.

ELROND: Oh, no. Stupid halfling dr00ds.

GANDALF: Yeah. So naturally, I decided to take it on the chin. I told everyone to run and I tried to hold off the Balrog by rooting him.

ELROND: And he got you.

GANDALF: No, actually, I had my shield up, and I just chain-nuked him.

ELROND: You SOLOED the Balrog? Wow.

GANDALF: Yeah, one hell of an XP hit too. But then when he fell, I turned and slipped off the ledge. I 10Ked when I hit the bottom of the Balrog pit. Didn't even have chance to loot his corpse. And there went the XP from the orcs, the troll, AND the Balrog. Stupid Verant.

ELROND: Your corpse is in the bottom of the Balrog pit?

GANDALF: Yeah. But no worries, I think I know a way to drag it out of there.

ELROND: That's good.

GANDALF: So, can I bum a SoW off you for a CR? I want to get back there before the Balrog respawns.

ELROND: This is Rivendell. We're high elves. The wood elves are in Lothlorien.

GANDALF: Nadgers. Which is where we were headed in the first place. Oh well, I'm a wizard at least, and there's a portal not too far from there.

ELROND: Good luck on your CR. Why were you hanging out with those noobs anyway?

GANDALF: I promised Frodo I'd powerlevel him in exchange for him completing the Cracks of Doom quest with me. He has the quest piece - the One Ring.

ELROND: That's NO DROP, isn't it.

GANDALF: Yeah.

ELROND: What do you get for completing that quest?

GANDALF: Robe of the White and Staff of the White. Those would be serious upgrades to my Grey robe and staff. I've had this gear for way too many levels anyway.

ELROND: Nice.

GANDALF: Anyway, I'd better go. Do you think you could get someone to go to the Moria zone to rez me once I get my corpse pulled there?

ELROND: I'll try to find a guildie.

GANDALF: Thanks.

(Exeunt.)

tacit
Nov. 2nd, 2008 03:42 pm (UTC)
BWAH! That's classic.
polylizzy
Oct. 15th, 2008 10:14 pm (UTC)
this is almost as entertaining as actually playing.....ALMOST

Darn my lack of income to be able to afford WoW again...
dilettantiquity
Oct. 15th, 2008 11:15 pm (UTC)
Bwahaha, that's awesome. :)

"Druid runs off to find some water so he can shift to sea lion form for no apparent reason. "

We always called that form Aquabutt.

(Have you had a look at Warhammer Online yet? I think I'm having fun...)
tacit
Nov. 2nd, 2008 03:39 pm (UTC)
I haven't! My roommate David has it, but I don't have any computers that'll run it; I'm a Mac person.
(Anonymous)
Oct. 26th, 2008 06:24 am (UTC)
WoW
That is so classic. I'm guessing that you are a warlock. Thanks for the laugh.
tacit
Nov. 2nd, 2008 03:39 pm (UTC)
Re: WoW
My main is a mage, actually, but it's still pretty close to the truth. Or at least it was before Warlocks just got hit by the nerf bat in the last patch. :)
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )