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Sex and math, and sex

Ugol's Law states that no sexual fetish is unique--that is, if something turns you on, then someone else, somewhere, is turned on by the same thing.

Shelly is currently in school, pursuing a degree in chemical engineering with an eye toward using it to get a doctorate in biomedical nanotechnology. More and more universities are offering graduate-level degrees in nanotechnology, mostly interdisciplinary degrees that bring together people from medical, physics, and chemical engineering backgrounds.

As you might imagine, her coursework involves rather a lot of math. And, as it turns out, Shelly is uncontrollably aroused by math. No, there isn't a word for it (I looked), but math gets her hot. Really hot.

And she's started doing her homework on my body, using a fine-point marker pen to work out problems on my back. Which is beyond hot. By the time she's finished with her homework, she's usually uncontrollably aroused and very aggressive. I won't bore you with what happens afterward, except that it involves numerous implements, floggers, and other things which might offend those with delicate sensibilities. In fact, I went in to the office today with a complex problem in analytical geometry written on my back.

So it should come as no surprise, then, that the Intellectual Sexiness Test meme that's been making the rounds these days says:

The Intellectual Sexiness Test
by dr_eros
Intellectual Inferno
You have an intellectual sexiness factor of 91!
Who am I to give you advice? You already know everything you need to know, and if there's something you don't know, you're eager to check it out. You are among the few special minds in the world that are truly free, totally creative, and absolutely sexy.

The downside is, it's hard to find partners who can keep up with your quick, vigorously sexy mind. You often find yourself bored with anything less than exciting sex, and only those who equal your intellect, your openess, and your creativity can provide that excitment. You're an avid reader, a deep thinking, and a sexually liberated person. You enjoy learning for its own sake just as much as you enjoy sex for pleasure's own sake.

Your partner, if he or she is able to keep up with you, is extremely lucky to have you.


I bet Shelly's score would be even higher, if there is a higher score.



( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 9th, 2005 09:54 pm (UTC)
using a fine-point marker pen to work out problems on my back. Which is beyond hot.

no kidding!
Sep. 9th, 2005 10:17 pm (UTC)
Yeah. That totally rocks! I think I'd love to get the RSA algorithm written out on my body during sex.
Sep. 10th, 2005 04:20 pm (UTC)
Not that I'm offering or anything, but would you want that in 1 line of Perl or the actual mathematical algorithm or what?
Sep. 9th, 2005 10:33 pm (UTC)
That's just awesome!
Sep. 10th, 2005 03:06 am (UTC)
Just for you, darlin', I took the damn thing. And scored an 86--intellectual inferno. Which isn't as impressive as yours, but then I don't own my own sex toy business. Now I'm pissed because okcupid didn't save it to my profile -- and wouldn't that be a great addition to my ad?

(It's probably totally being a buzz kill to say that the test is face-valid as all hell, and anybody with their share of brains could fake it anyway. But maybe that's the point?)
Sep. 13th, 2005 04:01 pm (UTC)
S'okay, fakig Internet personality tests is something of a spectator sport on LiveJournal anyway. :) You have me curious now, though. What's your OK Cupid username?
Sep. 10th, 2005 04:11 pm (UTC)
I got an 88, also an inferno.
I do like the idea about the equations on the back though. That's neat.
Yeah, chicks doing math around you is hot.
Sep. 12th, 2005 10:29 am (UTC)
calculophilia? mathematicaphilia? Arithmophilia? (Artithmophobia is the fear of numbers, but in most higher maths you really don't pay as much attention to the numbers)
Sep. 13th, 2005 04:04 pm (UTC)
Hmm, they all seem kind of awkward. "Arithmetic" comes from the Middle English "arsmetrik;" perhaps "arsmetriphilia"?
Sep. 13th, 2005 04:51 pm (UTC)
Phobias and philias are properly rendered in Greek; I believe "metrophilia" would capture the connotation you're looking for (it implies not only number but also measure). - ZM
Sep. 17th, 2005 01:37 am (UTC)
The problem I see with "metrophilia" is that, on the face of it, it would seem more likely to indicate an affinity for living in large metropolitan areas--a more common usage of "metro," I think.
Sep. 17th, 2005 02:37 pm (UTC)
Love of the city would be 'poliphilia', but I agree that most people would misinterpret 'metrophilia' the first time they hear it. That doesn't mean it's incorrect, though; I have kosmemophobia, but I'm not afraid of cosmetics. When going from one language to another, that sort of thing happens. - ZM
Sep. 14th, 2005 06:56 am (UTC)
I also used to get turned on in Math class, but not, apparently, to the degree that Shelly does. That's very cool! I only scored 84 but it is also "inferno" and says I "scored higher than 97% on sexiness". It's in my OKCupid profile along with all 121 tests I've taken so far (yeah, I know, it's sad).

~S (or Joreth by profile name)
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )