Franklin Veaux (tacit) wrote,
Franklin Veaux
tacit

  • Mood:

Random fun on a Saturday evening...

Last Thursday, i ate lunch in a small cafe on the first floor of the office building where I work. I ordered a tuna and cheese wrap, a SQL Server buffer overflow attack, potato salad, an F-22 Raptor, and duct tape. I didn't get all of the things I asked for, which was unfortunate. I won't say it ruined my lunch, exactly, but the afternoon wasn't all I had hoped it would be.

Poll #786693 About my lunch

What part of my order didn't I get?

Bacon
7(21.9%)
The fall of France in 1940
2(6.2%)
Liza Minelli
6(18.8%)
The Impressionist movement
6(18.8%)
The heat death of the universe
11(34.4%)

What could I have done differently?

Chosen what was behind Door 2
5(15.6%)
Sent my evil robot double in my place
8(25.0%)
Left "Slim" jones for dead and saved myself
3(9.4%)
Taken the suitcase full of money
12(37.5%)
Told him what he wanted to know
4(12.5%)

We have nothing to fear but fear itself.

True
2(6.5%)
False
5(16.1%)
Demi Moore
5(16.1%)
Lunar colonization
9(29.0%)
Whait a minute--did you say bacon?
10(32.3%)

Next time, I should bring...

Chains
2(6.2%)
Toxoplasma gondii (an obligate intracellular parasite)
3(9.4%)
A really, really, really big axe
14(43.8%)
My perspective
3(9.4%)
Surgically augmented reflexes
10(31.2%)

I've been told that I am my brother's keeper, but I only have a sister. What does that mean?

A straight flush beats four of a kind.
2(6.2%)
More bandwidth! More bandwidth!
6(18.8%)
Entropy takes it all in the end.
10(31.2%)
Move to San Francisco. It's all good.
11(34.4%)
The Sapir-Whorf hypothesis is nonsense
3(9.4%)

IS the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis nonsense?

"Nonsense" is relative.
7(21.9%)
A cheap hooker and a seedy hotel? Yes please!
3(9.4%)
Wi-Fi security--now THAT'S nonsense!
7(21.9%)
Snakes on a motherfucking PLANE!!!!
12(37.5%)
Gajun krink flux in debrous praxin? Frog! Frog!
3(9.4%)

And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my...

Turtles
4(12.5%)
Pokemon
2(6.2%)
Social life
5(15.6%)
Wikipedia entries
19(59.4%)
Dark vampiric embrace
2(6.2%)

Bonus question! A group of crows is called a "murder," a group of geese is a "gaggle," and a group of postmodern vampires is called:

a tedium
6(18.8%)
an angst
10(31.2%)
a kiss
2(6.2%)
a flower
0(0.0%)
a good reason to stay away from popular fiction
14(43.8%)
Tags: humor, musings
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