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Waking up

Every night, when I go to bed, the kitty Liam usully follows me and falls asleep on the pillow next to me. It's really heart-meltingly cute, and would be even cuter if he didn't have the habit of waking up at three o'clock in the morning and tearing around the apartment, or fighting with one of the stray cats around here through the sliding glass door onto the patio. (At least I assume that's what they're doing. Maybe they want to be friends, I don't know. Regardless, they bat at each other through the glass; it's about as noisy as a handful of marbles tossed into a blender.)

After the requisite "wake Franklin up in the middle of the night," Liam comes back to bed and curls up on the pillow again until morning comes.

Morning brings with it sharp teeth. The cat, you see, usually wakes up before I do, and morning is his "pet me" time. He lets me know it's "pet me" time by biting my nose until I'm awake, then biting my nose until I pet him.

Come to think of it, we have kind of a dysfunctional relationship, he and I. He badgers me into giving him attention, and I provide it.

I open my eyes each morning and see, blurry and out of focus, cat teeth right in front of my face. I can't help but think this is the last sight of many a small prey animal throughout history, and that if I were small enough for him to eat, he would no doubt make me into an hors d'oeuvres in a heartbeat.

I keep my cell pone next to my bed, so this morning, when Liam woke me with his customary "Pet me! Pet me, hyooman, or I shall rip the nose from your face and devour it before your very eyes!" routine, I snapped some phone camera pics so you, too, can see what I go through every morning.



Notice how he grabs my face with his paws. This is so he can prevent me from moving my nose away.

His teeth and claws are very sharp. Weird, it is, that we as a species enjoy sharing our homes with small predators.


Comments

( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
the_xtina
May. 23rd, 2008 09:14 pm (UTC)
Your hair is short!

Weird, it is, that we as a species enjoy sharing our homes with small predators.

It's made me an unsuitable prey-animal-owner.  "Would you ever own a hamster?"  "Why would I own food?"
tacit
May. 24th, 2008 10:24 pm (UTC)
And prey animals just aren't very interesting. A lot of the things I like about my cat, such as its curiosity, are assets in a predator but liabilities in a prey animal.
sxyvixen
May. 23rd, 2008 09:29 pm (UTC)
TOO FREAKING CUTE!
nekidsteve
May. 23rd, 2008 09:32 pm (UTC)
that makes even you look cute
tacit
May. 24th, 2008 10:27 pm (UTC)
Heresy! The rubber hose for you!
annafdd
May. 23rd, 2008 10:11 pm (UTC)
I have never had a cat who bit me to wake me up - possibly because I would growl, turn and push my head under the covers without waking up. I did however have a cat who liked playing with toes, as in, pounce on them and bite them. With time I had learned never to expose naked toes around the house. A few gentleman callers, however, got a nasty surprise during that particular cat's tenure...

(Came here from your amazing BDSM page. I can't believe that with all the overlap in our interests, we have no LJ friends in common! The world is vast after all)
candent
May. 23rd, 2008 11:15 pm (UTC)
I really really really enjoyed this post.
kytheriakhthoni
May. 24th, 2008 12:10 am (UTC)
Weird, it is, that we as a species enjoy sharing our homes with small predators.
I frequently feel that way.

I have two and I used to periodically declare to my house mate that our apartment was infested with small carnivorous predators. (To be fair he would frequently announce from another room that he was stroking my pussy.)
the_failed_poet
May. 24th, 2008 01:26 am (UTC)
Gawwww, ebil nose-biting kitteh. Why do we love them after all? Could it be their deceptive cuteness?
fringebenefits
May. 24th, 2008 01:40 am (UTC)
that is adorable and mean of him as well. good times!
zaiah
May. 24th, 2008 03:19 am (UTC)
This is sooo freaking adorable.
datan0de
May. 24th, 2008 04:56 am (UTC)
Now THAT is a genuine photo of you! I can tell because:
A) Your eyes are closed
B) All animals instinctively hate you, and wish to tear you to shreds

Seriously though, great post. Sometimes the little difficulties in life are also its most subtle joys.

Weird, it is, that we as a species enjoy sharing our homes with small predators.
Heck, I married a small predator! I sometimes think that the only reason why APAR never attacks me is because recognizes my place as "The Entity Most Likely To Be Spontaneously Eviscerated By femetal", and understands that if he does away with me then he moves into that spot.

I am cannon fodder to my cat.
tacit
May. 24th, 2008 10:34 pm (UTC)
Nonsense! Not all animals instinctively hate me; there are many species which instinctively love me, and want to be near me. Dire wolves, worgs, rats, vargrs, basilisks, and serpents in particular seem to have a natural affinity for me. So feh on you and your clones!
cheerilyxmorbid
May. 24th, 2008 05:37 am (UTC)
Oh my goodness, that is PRECIOUS. Liam's all "I shall eat your face OM NOM NOM" and you're barely awake. 'Scuse me while I melt into a puddle from all the cute.
My dog doesn't bite to wake me. He'll come in and plop down next to my bed with a long-suffering sigh. If my door's closed, he'll sit there and moan at me or scratch at the door. Once he gets in the room, he will lick my elbow, which is usually sticking out, until I maneuver out of his reach or pet him.
tacit
May. 24th, 2008 11:27 pm (UTC)
It only seems precious 'til you have needle-sharp teeth in your nose, believe me. :) I think, all in all, licking of the elbow is a much more polite and civilized way to request attention, and perhaps one I shall adopt myself.
cheerilyxmorbid
May. 26th, 2008 05:05 am (UTC)
I've experienced the needle-sharp cat teeth/claws phenomena, just not in my nose. It's decidedly not precious, especially when you're trying to disentangle said cat from your shirt so you can put him back in his cage. The perils of volunteering at animal shelters.
If you lick my elbow, I'll probably go "WTF are you doing that for?". Or faint from the shock. I figure it's about a 50/50 chance of either happening.
joreth
May. 24th, 2008 03:25 pm (UTC)
Weird, it is, that we as a species enjoy sharing our homes with small predators.

Not so wierd to me - I am a small predator, barely disguised in this furless, upright form. These are the creatures that hit my "awwww" button - those strange, hairless, pink and purple writhing and squaling things do not (I was trapped yesterday by a coworker who insisted on showing me those awful pictures of his newest offspring born on Monday ... ugh! How do I get out of that gracefully? I don't think they're cute and I'm not happy for you!).

My only conclusion is that I *am* a cat (as you've pointed out before) being rewarded temporarily by being allowed to enjoy the pleasures of this more complex form with opposable thumbs. So of course you want to share your home with small predators - you'd have to in order to like me!
libbydabomb
May. 24th, 2008 09:46 pm (UTC)
awe, that is so cute!
self_confusion4
May. 25th, 2008 04:51 pm (UTC)
Hey my cat does things like that too. Only her attention grabbing tactic is to lie on my head so she can knead and drool in my hair. Waking Heather Up Time is usually four in the morning when she finds things like my bra, shoelaces, rose plant to chew on, or attack any body part that may or may not have moved under the covers, or perhaps find something like the stapler on top of the fridge. I think most cat owners have dysfunctional relationships with their predator animals.
mizzpyx
May. 26th, 2008 01:07 pm (UTC)
My cat does that kind of thing too.

First, she sits right next to me and purrs REALLY LOUDLY in my ear. Then she starts pacing around the bed. Finally, when that has obviously not worked and I've just turned over and curled up in a ball, Operation Headbutt begins, along with Operation Knead With Claws.

All of this means that it's time for me to get up, feed her, pet her, and then let her out in the back garden. Nau.
minniethemoocha
May. 27th, 2008 09:09 pm (UTC)
This reminds me of Simon's practice of petting my face to wake me up... with his claws. He does it very gently. If I had heavier fur on my face, it would feel pleasant. He only occasionally gets too close to the eyes.
tacit
May. 28th, 2008 03:39 am (UTC)
He pets you? How ky00t! (Of course, when it comes to anything involving claws, it's always at least 57% more cute to an outside observer.)
( 22 comments — Leave a comment )