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trinker
Dec. 31st, 2010 10:31 am (UTC)
Privilege. You're *steeping* in it.

Nice poly pedestal you've built there, but it's your own fantasy construct. It's not some gold medal you can hang on someone for being "evolved enough", or whatever definition you want to stick on it.

What *is* your definition of this fantastic no-limits poly? The ultimate in free love? Poly-fi doesn't fit there, evidently.

Poly-identified people are as fucked up as anyone else, in similar proportions. It would be nice if that weren't so.

I'm cool with people saying, "that's not how *I* (want to) do poly..." but when someone says, "I don't ident as poly, and neither should $that_person..." That, I have a beef with, and I'm pretty sure a bunch of other people do, too. I'm sorry to tell you that your PolySantaToothFairy doesn't exist, but it's as much of a PolyUnicorn as the ultimate non-problematic HBB fantasy.

I should correct my statement about oppressive society. There is obviously oppression, but not the kind of overt oppression in other societies or previous times. Its certainly a struggle to live an alternative life style, but not impossible.

I'm guessing that you're not a parent, or a schoolteacher, or in a lot of other categories that don't have the privilege that a (single?) (het?) cismale does as far as non-mainstream relationships.

I struggle with finding what I want, but I don't blame social oppression for it. Yeah. Because *YOU* are privileged. Go seinneann_ceoil's comment here, she did a great job of laying it out. Privilege doesn't have to noticeably impinge on *your* circumstances to be real, and worth examining.
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trinker
Dec. 31st, 2010 11:38 am (UTC)
I strongly suspect you have more privileges than I do, although I may have privileges that you don't.

You have been continually shrugging off how much societal norms can *hurt* people, and that it's not so simple as a matter of *ignoring* or *transcending* them.

I'm not in a one-penis relationship. I never have been. But this discussion about labels and self-identity and privilege has only been bound by that particular scenario in your mind, if any.

I'm leaving this conversation here, because I am starting to become angry about having issues I haven't bared here in a public discussion dismissed as if they were delusions on my part, and I'm not willing to reveal those issues and expose those vulnerable disprivileges just to prove a point.
(Deleted comment)
trinker
Dec. 31st, 2010 11:50 am (UTC)
I'm leaving this conversation here, because I am starting to become angry about having issues I haven't bared here in a public discussion dismissed as if they were delusions on my part, and I'm not willing to reveal those issues and expose those vulnerable disprivileges just to prove a point.


And his username, incidentally, is tacit.